When it rains…

This summer hasn’t been the most carefree I’ve had. In fact, my summer nights, instead of being spent outside with friends or at a friend’s house, have been spent laying in bed alone and crying… I know it sounds horrible. And, I’m not playing the “woe is me” card. Though, it has seemed two people have played that lately and then blamed it on me. It has felt as though everyone else’s lives are so much more important than mine.

The reason I say that is because people have barely answered their phones when I call. The only person who does is Mikey all the way in L.A. I think if he hasn’t done everything he has, I would’ve lost it. I really do owe a lot to him. He’s shown me that not all people, not all guys are bad. There have been many laugh filled nights and for that I thank him profusely. Because of him, I’m learning to smile on my own.

They say that the most beautiful and most genuine smile is the one given after tears. They’re right. It felt really good to smile by myself . Though, I really miss my Dylan. And, it’s hard being completely single. But, with time, I’ll be okay. I just hope I get to see Dylan around my birthday, like he promised.

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Three Things I Like About Myself – Day One.

Today’s been really hard. I’m pretty sure I’ve lost Kyle since I haven’t heard from him since 5.30 pm yesterday. However, I just got off the phone with Dylan and he’s made me promise him something: To each day think about something I like about myself- a trait. So, I’m going to do it. Except, I’ll do three each day:

1) I’m kind hearted

2) A loyal friend

3) Talented singer.

Every day I’ll do three more until I love myself more. Even if they’re repeats. It’s the effort that counts. Dylan’s right. I have to become a stronger person, to evolve into more than just a human being.