Tell me when it’s my turn…

When will people understand? When will people see that I’ve put them before me so many times? How can they say that there’s no one worth fighting for? Am I not enough? Am I not worthy? I hid my tears and my pain to make sure they’re okay. I brush aside an er visit to make sure Dylan doesn’t give up. And what do I get? Nothing. No one said, “oh my god, are you all right? Do you need anything?”

Why must I suffer so much in silence when all I want is to be loved? I thought James would be constant now. But, I’ve barely heard from him all week. I’m scared that I’m losing him again… I just want to be told that I’m worth loving. That I’m ¬†allowed to be selfish for once.

But in the end, who gives a damn about me. No one. No one. Why? They’re too self-involved to see that I need love, too. One day they’ll turn around, needing support and realize that I’m not there… But, how much longer will that be? how much longer can I hold out and be selfless?

Someone just tell me that I’m worth something. That I’m worth loving and living for. that’s all I want… Please… before -I- give up…

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